A/N:  It’s getting harder to finish this thing.  GOD damn it.  Sorry for the delay – if it’s any consolation, I know how this is going to end.

It’s going to be delicious.

***^Unappreciated^***

//And the future hangs over our heads
And it moves with each current event
Until it falls all around like a cold steady rain
Just stay in when it’s looking this way\\

-Bright Eyes, “Another Traveling Song”

            Edgar shifted restlessly on the couch, trying to distract himself from Jimmy long enough to actually relax.  However, watching a blank wall wasn’t interesting enough to keep him occupied, and so he finally stood and moved to sit by the mattress, where Jimmy lay, shaking and sweating.

            Though outward appearances showed otherwise, Edgar was far from calm as he watched Jimmy shift on the mattress.  His heart had been pounding since he had punched that man, and his mind had been racing to figure out what Jimmy had been given, and if it would put him in a coma, or kill him.

            So far, his limited knowledge of the world of drugs proved to be useless, and so he sat, staring at the shaking boy.  He should have gone with him when he went to rest.  He should have taken him into the crowd when Tenna had taken him.  He should have done something.  Well, he had done something – he had punched the guy who could tell him what he was on, and caused him to run away.

            So, he hadn’t done anything that would help.  Wasn’t that pleasant.

            Jimmy muttered something unintelligible and rolled over, curling up into a ball on the mattress.  Edgar looked away, guiltily.  How did he know, really, that anything bad was going to happen to Jimmy, if he had gone to Johnny’s house?  A dream really didn’t tell you anything, when you thought about it.  Instead, he had blindly led a kid – he really wasn’t much older than twenty-one, couldn’t be – to a club, just so he could get doped up.

I’m just such the knight in shining armor, Edgar thought idly, running a hand through his hair.

            Jimmy jerked sharply, and then his eyes snapped open.  He shot up in bed, staring straight ahead, through the wall and to the very ends of the earth with new information.

            “I was supposed to die!”  He turned, and though his eyes still had that glazed look, he was clearly looking at Edgar.  “I was supposed to die!”

            “...Yes.  I suppose you were,” Edgar replied, calmly, despite the fact that he was filled with relief.  At least his ex-kidnapper wasn’t comatose.

            “I don’t... don’t mean from that guy at the fucking club!”

            “I know.  You meant Johnny.  He was going to tear you apart.”

            “But...”  Jimmy looked away, smoothing back sweat slicked hair and looking very tired.  “But... we’re... so much alike.  I’m...”  He turned to Edgar, plaintively, “I’m just like him!”

            “...I don’t think... I don’t think that Johnny likes himself very much, to be honest with you.”  The things he had discovered while in Heaven really told him that.

            “But...  How did you know what Nny was going to do?”  He was still calling Johnny by his nickname, Edgar noted idly.  Even though he would have killed him brutally and without mercy.

            “I... dreamt it.  Just like you did, I’m assuming.”

            Jimmy looked at the blanket that was crammed up around him.  “I was going to kill you for making me skip Nny for that club.  I was really going to kill you for that.  And then... then...”

            “You saw what would have happened.”

            Edgar fell backwards, head slamming painfully against the floor.  Jimmy was growling lowly, arm against Edgar’s neck and pushing down violently.

            “I would want to die because of Nny, you stupid fuck!  Do you know what that would mean?”

            Edgar wheezed a small “no,” surprised.  Wouldn’t that mean he was one of the people Johnny hated enough to kill?

‘           “He would have noticed what I had done!  He would have appreciated it, even if it was only to realize how fucked up he was!”

            “I- thought... don’t you id..lize...?”

            Jimmy nearly screamed, “Even if I idolize him I know he’s fucking crazy!  I’m not an idiot!  I might just be a little too crazy to care, did you think of that?!”

            No, Edgar hadn’t.  Edgar didn’t think like that.  He had figured that Jimmy just didn’t know enough about Johnny to properly be afraid of him – but the fact that he knew and didn’t care...

            “Why did you stop me?!  What gives you that right?!  What gives you the right to fucking mess up my ideal death?!”

            “I...I didn’t....”  Edgar could feel himself turning blue.  The boy’s sharp elbow was pressing against his throat, and he could barely get air through his windpipe.  “...Know!”

            “Goddamn you!  God-fucking-damn you!” Jimmy screamed, throwing himself back and nearly collapsing into the corner, hissing angrily and looking ready to strike out again.  Edgar gasped and scrambled back, holding his throat as if it would fall out.  He stared at Jimmy for a long time, almost in awe of the boy’s insanity.

            Because that’s what he was – insane.  Edgar hadn’t even let the thought cross his mind, and a snide voice in the back of his head told him that was because he was too afraid of crazy people.  Edgar agreed with the voice.

            “If...” Edgar began, then winced at the glare Jimmy sent him, “...If, that’s what you wanted..... it can’t be too late for you to go now.”

            Jimmy looked at him as if he were crazy – a laughable notion.

            “You wouldn’t let me go.”

            Edgar looked away.  “I don’t think I could stop you.”

            “How did you know?”

            Edgar looked up and stared at Jimmy, who looked back with a numb sort of curiosity.  “How did I know what?”

            “How did you know I was going to die?  You said you dreamed it.”

            “I did.”

            Jimmy’s eyes narrowed, “Who the fuck gave you the right to dream about me?”

            Edgar was about to respond that dreams couldn’t be controlled, but suddenly had a thought.  “I... no.”

            “No, what?” Jimmy pried.  Edgar sighed.

            “God?”

            Jimmy cackled.  “Now what kind of fucking God would give a shit about me?  What, did he point at you and go ‘you can keep Jimmy in line until Satan wants to fuck him’?”

            “...Not... not precisely.  I wouldn’t remember.  I...”

            Well, now was probably the best time to tell him, if Edgar was ever going to do it.

            “I didn’t live through Johnny’s house.  I... he tore me into shreds.”  When he saw Jimmy’s mouth drop a little, he continued, “Literally, really.  It was quite painful.  Then... well.  I can’t remember, exactly.  There was something... I was, overall, content.  And then I suddenly...”  Edgar made a motion with his hand, “Poofed, you could say.  Into existence.”

            Jimmy stared at him.  “You’re saying... you fucking died, and then came back from wherever... just to eat fast food?”

            “...Well, no.  I’m assuming the fact that I met you, and then conveniently had a dream of you dying, means I came back to prevent that death.”

            “So, shouldn’t you be, like, flying back to heaven or whatever?” Jimmy questioned, before blinking and shaking his head.  “Goddamn, what am I saying?  This is fucking stupid.  Don’t try fucking lying to me!”  Jimmy was looking like he was about to attack Edgar again.

            “I’m not!” Edgar exclaimed, throwing up his hands in his defense, “Do I seriously look like someone with that kind of imagination?”

            Jimmy frowned deeply, then slowly shook his head.  “I... guess not.  Then... if you came back just to save me from death...?”

            Edgar shrugged, lines already connecting and finally giving him the answer to at least one of his thousands of questions.

            “...Then what are you?  My guardian angel or something?”

            That sounded even more ridiculous out loud than it had in Edgar’s head, but he was starting to fit that M.O.  He shrugged again.

            Jimmy cackled again.  “God-fucking-damn.  I’m in an episode of Touched By A motherfucking Angel!”

            “I’m not your guardian angel!” Edgar responded, indignant.

            “Then what are you?!” Jimmy shouted, “Why are you here?!  Did you really get sent from heaven or did you fall from it?!  Why are you here, why are you in my home telling me this bullshit?!”

            “I don’t know!” Edgar exclaimed, “If I knew, don’t you think I’d tell you?!”

            “You sure don’t know a fucking lot, do you?!”

            Edgar made a strange sound in the back of his throat, and got up, stalking towards the door, “I don’t know why I’m bothering.”

            Edgar nearly tore the door open, but the knob slipped from his grasp as Jimmy forcefully slammed it shut.  The older man turned sharply, glaring from behind spotted glasses at the younger, who had his arms up and pinning Edgar to the door.

            “You don’t know, you don’t know,” Jimmy growled, “Shit, Edgar, is there anything you do fucking know?”

            “I know what it’s like to get ripped to shreds by your idol,” Edgar hissed back, “And you have to be insane, if you think it’s a privilege to go through that.”
            “Nny chose you for a reason!  He always has a reason!” Jimmy exclaimed.

            Edgar laughed humorlessly.  “No, Jimmy, no, he didn’t have a reason.  He just ‘really needed to have some blood.’  He even agreed he could have picked a better person than me.  So no, I wasn’t an asshole to him.  I had never seen him before.  I didn’t do anything to him – I don’t do anything to anyone!  You would be the first person I had a somewhat coherent, sane conversation with in years, including Heaven!”  Edgar shoved against Jimmy, who idly allowed the other to pass and pace to the center of the room.  “And of course,” Edgar drawled, falling onto the battered couch, “You have to be insane too.”

            “I didn’t ask you to help me,” Jimmy growled, moving forward.  He stumbled a little, looking dizzy, and Edgar was up in a flash, grabbing his arm.

            “...You should still be laying down,” he murmured, guiding his ex-kidnapper to the mattress.  “You’ll want to rest for a while.”

            Edgar could feel Jimmy’s eyes on his back as he went back to the couch, and – if he looked out of the corner of his eye – he could see the younger man watching him from the shadowy corner.  Edgar spotted the remote to a television he hadn’t noticed, and he turned it on.

            “I didn’t ask you to help me,” Jimmy repeated.  Edgar sighed.

            “I know.”

            Edgar could feel the shadows moving over the wall, and could feel Jimmy’s eyes on him, but as long as he was within the dull blue glow of the television screen, he would be alright.

***^^***